a BIG lesson from a LITTLE girl

Funny how it was just last week that I was bragging about being at the "top of my game." I was really feeling like I had things figured out and was functioning at my best. Well, let this be a lesson that once you reach your goal, it takes a lot of work to just maintain.

I have been feeling so overwhelmed and scattered this week. (and a little of last week too, I must admit. Can someone say GRUMPY?) It's obvious that, once again, I have taken on one too many things, agreed to too many extra curricular activities for our family and am spread way too thin. I should know that things are on a downward spiral in our home when my poor husband has to fish for his boxer shorts every morning from the large mountain of clean laundry that is on top of the pool table! I've just been on edge, ready to explode and not the most patient or pleasant wife and mommy lately.

This morning I was rushing from one thing to the next, as usual. I hurried through my workout, and while I took a quick shower I prayed. I had a fast chat with God and asked for some much needed patience and tranquility and calm to get me through the day. Moments later I was frantically coaxing my daughter to get ready for her dance lesson that we were on the verge of being late for. She threw herself on the floor and cried "I don't want to go. We are always going somewhere. I want to stay home. Let's just stay home!!"

Well, thank you God for that much needed intervention! I looked at her adoringly and agreed, "Katelyn, you're right, let's just stay home!"

So we just hung out and I finally folded and put away all that laundry. And while I got stuff done around the house I watched my girls play dress up together, and build a fort in the closet and play "jumping" in Taylor's crib and I watched Katelyn pull Taylor around on her rocking horse while they both giggled and yelled " Yee Haw, Ride "Em Cowboy!"

It's so hard for me to find the perfect balance that works. I want so much to be a good stay-at-home mom. I truly want to be a supportive, attractive and attentive wife, a dedicated and effective mother, I want to be competant at taking care of the house and of my family. I enjoy this job, take pride and pleasure in it and believe that I can do it well. But, darn, it's hard! It's so difficult to take care of those things and those people, and to still have time and energy take care of myself, to nurture my relationship with God and to explore my own passions and interests. It's impossible to give 100% to all of those areas...and for me....it's even more hard not to.

I am grateful that instead of driving like a maniac to get to a dance lesson that Katelyn doesn't even care about....I instead heard the voice of my God through my daughter. It sounded something like this....."Kim, slow down!"

"Be still, and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10